It’s been a long time since I wrote something. I was caught up in a lot of things.
Anyway, this week, I want to write about the struggles of being an outgoing girl.
The outgoing personality is very often misinterpreted, misunderstood and misconceived. Especially when a girl has an outgoing personality, there are a lot of struggles she has to face. Over the past few days, people in my inner circle, including me had a few terrible experiences which compelled me to write this post. I think everyone should know who we really are and what goes on in our mind.
First of all, what’s the meaning of outgoing?
If someone is friendly and socially confident, you may think how can these outgoing girls be possibly misconceived.
- No, we are not dying for your validation or attention.
Even google has misconceived us, look at the last word among the synonyms – attention-seeking. Seriously Google!! We just love what we do. Let us live our lives. There are people who get bothered by the way we look, talk, post etc., and complain that we need attention. NOT everything we do is for validation. We do something because we love it.
2. Yes, we ARE like this.
There are different sets of people – silent ones, people who open up to their close friends, outgoing people. What makes life interesting is the diversity. We are friendly, fun-loving people. Just another set of normal people!
3. Just because a girl wears whatever she wants, NO, she is not slutty.
When a girl wears whatever she likes, be it a kurta or a sari or shorts, it doesn’t matter. She dresses up the way she wants. A very popular South Indian actress called Samantha faced the same issue recently. People thought it was inappropriate to wear shorts because she was married. You people who all judge a girl by her dressing choices should realize that she is comfortable in her skin. So, don’t waste your time and energy judging her dressing style. Don’t slut-shame or body-shame or bitch-slap people.
4. No, we are NOT open to flirting/meeting/getting hit on by random people.
I emphasize this. Do NOT just assume things. Recently, I posted a picture on Instagram at 1.30 a.m. because generally I tend to sleep very late. Some random guy who I barely knew started video-calling me at that hour. I didn’t pick it up and this despo found me on Facebook and started pinging there too. What was going in his head? That’s beyond my thinking. No, we are not interested in answering video calls with random strangers. Some people have crossed the limits of common sense completely and start sending vulgar messages when we don’t reply. Trust me, there are a lot of girls who face this issue.
5. No, You don’t have the right to harass her physically/mentally/in any way.
A junior of mine faced this issue while she was travelling to Mumbai from Chennai. She was supposed to go from Chennai to Bangalore by bus and then she had to board a flight at Bangalore to go to Mumbai. That was the time when there were a lot of chaos due to the Cauvery river issue. Since all the buses were cancelled due to the ongoing strikes, she took the initiative and talked to the passengers and planned to take some alternative route. Later that night, the guy sitting beside her, who seemed ‘decent’ and well-educated started touching her. How perverted can a person be?
Just because a girl is outgoing and friendly doesn’t mean she is going to be okay with everything.
6. No, we don’t have an attitude problem.
Just because we blurt everything out and just because we are very straight-forward, people misunderstand us. The truth is, we have the guts to speak the truth and our tolerance levels towards bullshit is sub-zero.
7. NO, We don’t want to be told what to do with our life, except if it comes from family or very close friends.
Apparently, there are people who offer others free advice on social media. A guy has offered me free advice of what to wear and what not to wear. I made it very clear that I don’t need his valuable advice. Then he says, it’s a comment and he doesn’t need my effing permission to comment on what I do with my life. Slow claps!! Thanks, but no Thanks bro!!
8. Lastly, DO NOT JUDGE.
To all the people who still want to poke noses in others’ businesses, keep your self-righteous attitude to yourself and stop judging.
Instead of asking a girl to change her personality, it’s better that all of us rethink what we are doing.
Live and let live!!